According to a study conducted by Jan Brueckner at U.C. Irvine, people who live in the suburbs “have more friends, better community involvement and more frequent contact with their neighbours than urbanites who are wedged in side-by-side.” Story by Shannon Proudfoot about this study.
MY EXPERIENCE IN THE ‘BURBS
I suppose this does not surprise me. As a high school student I lived in Clear Lake (an affluent suburb of Houston). During those years I came to know and love my neighbors.
The people who lived near my family supported me and my ambitions, sometimes with their checkbooks, but very often they would step across the line of gesture and make a real investment in my life.
Next door lived Ron, a “baby-boomer” approaching retirement, who helped me build half a dozen physics projects in his garage workshop. Imagine that, he took several of his Saturday afternoons off and helped a teenager with his homework. What’s more is that during our time in his shop it was clear that he really cared about me. He helped me learn woodwork and a little bit of what it means to be a good man.
Across the street there was Jim. I remember him as this really neat family man who would often take the time to encourage me and shed a little light on my path. While I was in high school, he always took the time to brag on my clean car or on what a good job I had done mowing the lawn. Those little complements amount to a lot. Later on, when I was a freshman in college he gave me great career advice. Because he worked for SUN Microsystems his advice meant a lot to me as a fish in Computer Engineering. Maybe he realized that I was asking him questions about SUN in order to daydream or even to land a job, but that did not seem to bother him. He liked me and did not mind breaking from his day to talk.
The list should go on and on because Ron and Jim were not alone in their support. Both of those guys have lovely wives who treated me as one of their own, often greeting me with a hug and a snack when I dropped by. I never lacked for a mom in the suburbs.
Not that my parents failed me in any way, mind you. No one has better parents than I have. No one. The reality is — sorry Ms. Dole — that it does take a village to raise a child.
As a high school student, my village was in the suburbs. The men and women at my church, in my school and living in my neighborhood did a bang-up job. I hope my life will honor their investment.
The study mentioned earlier reinforces my experience. Its results challenge the accepted idea that suburban life is a socially alienating notion. That notion has inspired everything from the Academy Award-winning American Beauty to Harvard professor Robert Putnam’s book Bowling Alone. Proudfoot.
It even provides a little math formula for calculating the value of low population density (10% decrease in population density = 10% increase in neighborhood involvement). Cute.
A PARTIAL ENDORSEMENT
I like the idea of a promoting healthy suburbs filled with people who care about one another. It should be said, however, that there are some traits of suburbs which I am less than enamored with.
Last year, I posted an applicable quote by Rich Mullins on this site. Rich is one of my heroes in life and ministry, so his quotes mean a lot to me. Here it is again:
Christianity is not about building an absolutely secure little niche in the world where you can live with your perfect little wife and your perfect little children in your beautiful little house where you have no gays or minority groups anywhere near you. Christianity is about learning to love like Jesus loved and Jesus loved the poor and Jesus loved the broken.
(Emphasis added).
Rich’s criticism of the tendency of church-people to be isolationists seems to identify everything which is wrong with the suburbs. If the suburbs stand for thinning out the herd so that we can get to know our neighbors, I like them. If they stand for indulging bigoted worldviews for those people forced to live near cities, then I hate them.
It seems to me that in reality the suburbs stand for both. That is, they allow people to live in a less crowded setting AND to hide from people in demographics alternative to their own. Consequently, I can see how there will always be a love-hate feeling toward them.
FINDING A BALANCED VIEW
Nonetheless, the distinction between virtue and vice lies in the heart of man. Human action is the same whether noble or ignoble; i.e., living in the suburbs looks the same whether for right or wrong motives.
As for me, I currently live one and half miles from downtown Houston. I suppose that I known my neighbors, but not very well. We are all too busy to make any lasting investments in one another. The irony is that for this chapter in my life (studying for law school all the time) I’m pretty-okay with the strange tension between nearness and isolation.
I guess I feel like I’m too busy to invest myself in everyone near me. I realize that this is a selfish way to live, but I think my neighbors have a similar feeling. We’re not rude or unconcerned, we just? well? busy.
A distinction needs to made as to the city’s benefits. I enjoy living in the city for different reasons than I did in Clear Lake. From my townhome I am five minutes from most of Houston’s treasures (MFAH, Hermann Park, Rice University, Minute Maid Park, the Zoo, Houston Grand Opera, etc.), many of which I attend on a regular basis. Not to mention how much stress I save by not commuting on I-10 or I-45 for eight hours a week.
In my view, a love of tolerance and diversity stand for virtue, and the city seems better able to nurture these than the suburbs. The tapestry of cultures in Houston are astonishing this city’s soul is made up of contributions made by a thousand different groups, our cuisine and nigh-spots are proof.
But this post is meant to give the suburbs their due. They are not void of diversity or cultural events, but knowing what the urban-setting does and does not provide seem to punctuate the suburb’s appeal.
I love the suburbs for what they are, a good place to raise a family and know your neighbor without giving up all urban conveniences. Provided that its inhabitants are not running from the joys of diversity they’re all right with me.
In conclusion, if you live in a suburb, why not walk next door and introduce yourself. I’ll try and do the same down here? that is, when my neighbors have the time.
